When I was a little girl I used to love watching the football games with my dad. As I grew older, the more I watched the games the more I realized the commentators used large grandiose words that I'd never heard before and that I definitely didn't know the meaning of. For some reason it wasn't good enough for me to just accept the fact that I didn't know what the words meant. So I decided to tape a piece of paper to my television and each Sunday there I was, a little black girl, watching the football games, writing down any word I didn't know the meaning of on that piece of paper, with my dictionary sitting close by. It's sounds like a silly sight to see and as I'm typing this I can envision myself back then “trying to become educated.” In hindsight I realize that my actions were larger than my quest for knowledge. Attached to my decision of making sure I was educated, was the desire of not accepting complacency. I look back thru my years of living and I can say with certainty that I've never just wanted to accept being complacent, normal, average. I've always desired more, once I realized more existed. Always. Now as an adult I ask myself where is the little girl who unknowingly had a passion to exist beyond a life of complacency? Does she still exist? Or have I just become content with the now, not really reaching or even expecting something more or better than what I have?
It's a question that when I first asked myself the immediate answer was yes she still exist, she's still right here! And I agree, she is, but oh how much I've changed! Yes I'm the same little black girl with the desire of not accepting being complacent, normal, average...yet I don't believe I'm just as quick to grab that piece of paper and take action for myself. Why? Well, the stakes are higher, responsibility higher, realization of failure higher, the number of my age higher, amount of people depending on me higher, the amount of time that's lapsed or passed is higher, I could go higher and higher and higher but honestly they all sound like me accepting that fact that with some things I have to be complacent and that's just not true. Yes our circumstances change but our mindset and beliefs doesn't have to. Everything we do in life is a choice. Regardless of any circumstance change in life, we must decide whether we're gonna hold on to who we are, or allow who we are to change because the circumstance has changed.
With the start of the football season this year for some reason I decided to start watching football again. After years of just disregarding the sport and only watching during the play-offs and Superbowl, I decided to tune in again. The newsflash or revelation for me was “How did I ever allow this sport to leave my life?!” I absolutely enjoy football and I get so caught up that I can't help but yell at the television screen as though I'm actually at the game. So with the startup of watching football again, I realize that I recognize the words the commentators are using now and there's hardly a word that makes me want to run and grab a dictionary. Yet I find myself with the startup of this season discovering the same little black girl, who contained an earnest passion to exist beyond a life of complacency. I'm grabbing that piece of paper and taking action for myself again, this time not to discover definitions but to discover the fullness of life. I think you should grab a piece for yourself too! My bet is if we stick it out the entire season, no matter which team we find ourselves on, we'll come out as MVP of the year.
1-2-3-Hike!
~Dee
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